As hard as I try, I just can't get used to being jobless. I mean, I should know, right? The fiasco with the Georgia Department of Corruption left me jobless, and I survived. This time around, being jobless was entirely expected; indeed, I looked forward to a bout of relaxation. Unfortunately, I find myself lost without a job title to identify. Try going to a knitting group in swanky Ferndale, Michigan and explaining to self-starting, progressive women that you don't work. Okay, most of them moaned in jealousy, but the point is: I'm a worker! And more importantly: I'm a spender! So. I'm in peril.

Here's the idea, then: minimize life. New tiny house, new tiny budget, new tiny grocery stores, new tiny wardrobe...new tiny existence. How to be without extras. How to think without extemporaneous input. How to program the Tivo. God, I love Tivo. Anyway.

Hey, newsflash! Detroit is suffering from a bit of a depression. I know you're probably shocked, what with it being Mo-Town and all these car companies here, but actually, most of them have dried up and gone south..to Mexico, that is. Detroit is a ghost town. Eerie, actually, driving around streets of abandoned homes, some just burnt remnants of craftsman styled homes built in the era of big cars and bigger gas tanks. It's melancholic and lonely and ever-so poetic, and it would be even more poetic if I didn't know that people, REAL people, have to live in squalor and poverty because of the lack of industry. And I had this naive concept that if more people are living in squalor and poverty, Michigan would be rife with social service agencies. It is not so, my friends. It appears that the problem may very well lie in the fact that so few agencies are funded to combat the problems of Detroit. And I am left with very few options.

Which leads me to the strip clubs. I've already documented how many there are, but I am being led closer to the doors of the The Thrifty Hooker. No, there is no establishment with such a name...YET...perhaps I can remedy that situation.

Does anyone have any 'get rich quick' schemes that work? Even 'get somewhat employed for an average income and pay down your credit card bills' would work. I'll take any suggestions. Really. ANY. Morality is becoming rather flexible as long as the bills pile up....

Labels: Detroit, social work, unemployment