Monday, September 19, 2005
Southern Interstates and other oxymorons...

Okay, first off: if anyone tells me I'm not putting enough effort out to find a job, I have this to say:

"SCREWUS YOUUS"

Secondly, WHO THE HELL except me DRIVES all over Atlanta to DROP OFF a resume, rather than faxing, emailing, fedexing, or camel packing it to the location?

Today started with hope. I had a cover letter, a resume, an application. I actually blow-dried my hair. I put on a SKIRT! A skirt, I tell you! (Monkey, you're rubbing off on me). I got in my car. I filled it up with gas. That was expensive, so I SKIPPED coffee.

I got on I-75 South. I looked for exit 109, like the directions said. THERE IS NO EXIT 109!! So, I got off in downtown Atlanta. I headed into Decatur, then Dekalb. Then, I got onto I-285 (seen above). I almost died four times. One dude was going 100 miles per hour and almost hit me. His car had a neon price sticker on the windshield. I don't really care if you stole the car; JUST DON'T HIT MY NEW CAR!! Anyway, I drove almost completely around the Perimeter. I wound up in Atlanta AGAIN. I was driving for THREE HOURS before I found the office building I needed; mind you! The computer said it was only 28 miles away from my house. I put over 150 miles on my car today, all because SOUTHERNERS don't know how to LAY OUT STREETS. I HATE this city, sometimes. How can I have lived here for like thirteen years and STILL get lost?

After all that, I got lost COMING back. I wound up in Bankhead, and for those of you who listen to rap music...well, let's just say, "Bankhead represents". Of course, some thug came up to carjack me and I was all, "It's a stick," and he was all, "Oh, I don't know how to drive that. Can I take your purse?" and I was all, "No, because I just got fired and I don't really have any money." and he was all, "Dammit. Stupid blond honky bitch."

SO, I'm home. I'm not going out. I'm NOT MOVING. I'm sitting still, in the quiet, in my pajamas until tomorrow. And I'm going to call that office building back for BETTER directions come my interview!
Written by FRITZ
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Name: Fritz

Location: Detroit Rock City!
Where the weak are killed and eaten

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