Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Okay, you see the toe next to the pinky toe? Look, I'm a hyperchondriac. I got bit by a red ant and a mosquito on the same day on THE SAME TOE. It's swollen and tingly. I put antibiotic stuff on it, but I'm convinced I now have malaria and some kind of ant-transmitted encephalitis. This toe is going to fall off. It itches so much that I keep dragging it across the carpet the way a dog scratches its behinds when it has fleas. I don't have fleas, I just have really bad luck. So, if I get Lyme disease and malaria and TB tomorrow and don't post, you'll know it is because I am in the hospital, dying of a diseased toe. It's the kind of itching that will drive you crazy. It looks like a sausage...a chorizo in bright red casing. You know, people call me paranoid. I say I'm perceptive. Wouldn't you know Michael is on a business trip? I'm going to have to call the ambulance and go the hospital alone. Don't look at my pedicure. It needs help, too. Please pray for me when I'm in the oxygen tent, begging for a cigarette...
Written by FRITZ
| Link | 4 wise cracks! |

Name: Fritz

Location: Detroit Rock City!
Where the weak are killed and eaten

Click here to find out
even more!

What My Brain is Eating
  • eatpraylove
  • www.flickr.com
    This is a Flickr badge showing public photos from Nukes524. Make your own badge here.

    What I Live By:
    We shall not cease from exploration And the end of all our exploring Will be to arrive where we started And know the place for the first time. Through the unknown, unremembered gate When the last of earth left to discover Is that which was the beginning; At the source of the longest river The voice of the hidden waterfall And the children in the apple-tree Not known, because not looked for But heard, half-heard, in the stillness Between two waves of the sea. Quick now, here, now, always— A condition of complete simplicity (Costing not less than everything) And all shall be well and All manner of thing shall be well When the tongues of flame are in-folded Into the crowned knot of fire And the fire and the rose are one. -T.S. Eliot "Little Gidding"

    I Heart Tits


    Blogarama - The Blogs Directory